Celebration!

Yes, Kool and the Gang has been playing in our house!

So you may remember we had a list of things we needed to achieve before the baby arrived. Well this week, great progress was made...Mr A passed his driving test! Woo hoo! First time!
No driving to the hospital while I have contractions! :)

It wasn't until he passed that I realised the pressure he had been putting on himself to make sure he passed soon. An impending 6 hour car journey to the lake district for xmas was playing on his mind. I'll be honest I haven't been looking forward to that but now knowing we can share the task is brilliant. I am so chuffed for him!

Now we can focus on getting ready for the baby. I feel a trip to mothercare in the January sales may be in order! :)

Health worries

"Hmmmmm.... let me just get the consultant for a second opinion."

This is just want you want to hear when you are in a hospital with a scanning probe stuck up god knows where and you are on your own!

To give you the full story - a while ago we went for the anonomaly scan at 22 weeks and everything seemed ok. The baby wouldn't cooperate but the sonographer managed to get every measurement she needed except the head size so we made another appointment to come back for the final measurement. The date took a while to come through but when it finally came round it was only one measurement so I said I was fine to go on my own - BIG MISTAKE!

The baby still wasn't laying in the ideal position but after a bit of manoeuvring the sonographer managed to get the measurements she needed, then she asked to check a few things with an internal scan. I am not a massive fan of those but if that is what is needed then fine I thought.

Then after a soul destroying 5 minutes where I was told to hold the probe tight while she went to get someone - seriously!! - the consultant arrived and announced that my cervix is short. Why am I meant to know what that means?!?!
Then maddeningly she announced 'for now we are going to call it normal'. Is it normal or not for gods sake??? They have decided not to give me a stitch for now so we'll see if it becomes any more of an issue - fingers crossed! Most frustratingly was the stress and worry of the whole experience which meant I asked none of the right questions.

Moral of the story... don't go to a scan alone. Nothing really happened yet I managed to leave myself in a state of worry and confusion. Thank god for the local GP who was able to reassure and calm me down. Now we are just keeping everything crossed that "we are going to call it normal" becomes "yep looks normal to me".

Home improvement mid pregnancy? Bad plan.

So if you read my last post you'll have seen that top of the list to do before our bundle of joy arrives is do up the bathroom. Anyone that knows me, will confirm that this has been top of my to-do-list long before we became pregnant. it just never quite happened.

Our impending arrival has finally given us the kick up the backside we need. The tiles and towels have been stored in our spare bedroom for 9 months or something horrendous like that, writing for us to get sorted, but now they finally get their day to break out of the plastic! So about a week and a half ago a group of plumbers and decorated embarked on transforming our tired and a bit minging bathroom in to an oasis of calm. Ambitious I know, especially considering the whole place is about 9ft by 6 ft but I have grand plans.

It is going really well, with the redesign in full swing and the tiles going up on the wall. See below for a few 'in-progress' shots.

Massive downside though. What happens to every woman when she is pregnant - yep she suddenly needs to go to the loo about 20 times a day. So when the plumber announced we weren't going to have an operational toilet for a couple of days I was disappointed. When he announced we had bought the wrong toilet from bathstore and that we were going to need to wait a week or so I cried. Just cried. Thankfully they came up with a temporary solution - I think mainly as the plumber just didn't want to incur any more emotional wrath from a pregnant woman on the edge, but it worked! Never again will I underestimate how much I value the ability to flush one's own loo!

Moral of the story

1. Sort out major home improvements before you are pregnant and have no patience or bladder control
2. When in bathstore become a mind reader and instantly know when you need a toilet with a side waste pipe option
3. When everything goes wrong, play the pregnancy card and plumbers and bathstore folk will bend over backwards to find solutions more quickly. Infact not quite sure why I haven't done it before.

Fingers crossed by the end of this week we should have a fully functioning bathroom. Woo hoo! Now to just sort out the nursery ;)

The baby bus!

All the books list the same sorts of things you need to get in advance of having a baby;

• a decent buggy
• a cot, moses basket etc.
• breast feeding stuff
• car seat
• bottles sterilisers
• a never ending supply of nappies and baby clothes

Our list included all of these but included a few rather significant extras:

• Finally do up the bathroom - it will NEVER get done if we don't do it now
• Re-carpet upstairs
• Mr A needs to learn to drive - the idea of me driving myself to hospital while having contractions wasn't a popular image.
• We need to ditch what is really a bit of a mobile death trap (ANCIENT dented toyota corolla) and replace it with a modern baby safe estate or car with at least a boot that can fit in more than three tesco bags
• Go on holiday while we still have the chance!

• I'll let you know how we get on as the months go by, but this week we have really made some serious progress! First step was the baby bus :)

So how did it happen?

I don't come from a family that gives extravagant gifts. I don't mean we are tight, far from it, just that my sister and I have been brought up to earn what we have and not expect to be given anything on a plate. So it came as a major surprise when dad and mum announced they were going to give us their car!!!!

Yes it actually worked out quite well for them too. Mum can justify getting a new car more suitable for her lifestyle and they aren't stuck with three cars. It also means we can give my sister our toyota when she really needs a helping hand, so all in all it works for everyone, but it is still an incredibly generous thing to do. We are suitably excited. The car has air bags, central locking, air con, a boot the size of a small country and even a sun roof! I know this is hardly going to get it on the Top Gear cool wall but none the less it's pretty exciting.

We picked it up from my sister's house in Sheffield ( long story) and drove it all the way back to Twickenham without stalling it once. The conversion from an automatic to a manual wasn't as hard as we thought it would be. It is still a bit noisy in the low gears - probably my clutch control being a bit underpar but we are getting there.

Only significant hurdle to overcome - how the hell do I park it????? It is very very very long. I actually had a little celebration when I managed to get it in a multi-storey car park in Wimbledon. I can't quite face the Kingston Bentalls centre. That carpark is evil! I'll keep trying and hope I don't crash it before we take it up to the family for Xmas.

All that remains is for Mr A to learn how to drive it, and believe it or not progress has been made there too. Update to come :)

Anomaly scan

So this week we went for the anomaly scan.

I know it is really about checking that the baby is healthy and growing well but for me I was mainly excited at just seeing the little one again. It was a different experience to last time though. At 12 weeks I was looking for confirmation that I wasn't making it up and there was infact a baby, but this time round I have been feeling quite a lot of movement so I know our little one is in there somewhere. To see him/her on the screen though is still very special.

As usual the baby wasn't feeling cooperative so the scanner couldn't really get the all the measurements she was looking for. After lots of jumping up and down twisting the little one really wouldn't cooperate so they wanted me to go for a walk and then come back in half an hour. Unfortunately I had a work meeting I couldn't get out of so I now have to go back again in a few weeks so they can do the final head measurements. This delay is making me feel a little uneasy. I know the likelihood that anything is wrong is minor but I still would quite like the scanner to say 'perfect' a few more times when making those measurements.

For now I'll have to wait and ponder what we do know:

• All body, digit and heart measurements were as expected  - great news
• He/she has very long legs - My husband is 6'2" so it was never going to be a short baby but this is still making me wonder if this means its a boy
• We don't know if its a boy or a girl. We were strong and didn't find out although we had the opportunity to do so.  It was very strange turning down information on the little one - I want to know everything I can - but hopefully the surprise on the day will be worth it.

So until the 23rd November I'll be keeping everything crossed that our little one has a normal sized head and in the meantime I'll use Google to worry myself with what it could mean if it isn't!

Pregnant bridesmaid

So all being well I am going to be a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding about 10 weeks after the baby is born.

When I finally reached the 12week goal and was able to tell everyone about the pregnancy I was really worried about telling her as it means I won't be able to go on the hen do, I'll have a new born at the wedding and the timing of the bridesmaid dress shopping needed to be determined by me not her. All in all, not ideal. Thankfully she was really happy for me. After all we've each only got one sister so I want her to have the best day ever and she is looking forward to being an Auntie for the first time.

So now I am 21 weeks gone and starting to look a bit pregnant it seemed about time to sort out the bridesmaid dresses. As the baby will only be 10 weeks old at the wedding (if he/she isn't late) then I am not exactly going to be looking like Cheryl Cole so the dress needed to be forgiving on the figure but still beautiful and summery to fit the occasion.

We started with an appointment at a bridal shop to try proper bridesmaid dresses. Wow that was a horrendous experience! All the dresses were a size 12 (I'm a 14 when I don't have a passenger on board) so holding various dresses that only just covers me up was pretty rubbish while the other two bridesmaids looked brilliant in their size 8/10 and 12 shapes.

I would therefore like to thank the wonderful store that is Debenhams and more specifically Coast who saved the day. They have some absolutely beautiful maxi-dresses so if you are looking for elegant dresses that make everyone look amazing, have enough structure to hold you in and are forgiving at the same time head there! I had to go for a size 16 to be safe, mainly to ensure that my ever expanding chest would be well catered for size didn't really matter. The dresses are beautiful so give them a try!

http://www.coast-stores.com/all-dresses/dept/fcp-category/categorylist

http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/Navigate?ps=&storeId=10001&catalogId=10001&x=0&y=0&txt=coast+maxi

Getting bigger?

So having hit the 20 week mark I expected to be quite big by this point and struggling to hide a noticeable baby bump. However, I appear to have just put on a few pounds and maybe filled out a bit around the tummy, but not what I would call a bump. The only clothes where I think it is really noticeable are my business suit dresses when they are tailored to a waistline I perhaps don’t have at the moment, so after switching to smart trousers it has been pretty easy to hide any physical signs I am pregnant. That said my boobs have got quite a bit bigger but as they were pretty big in the first place no one has noticed the difference, or if they have they have kept it to themselves! ;)

I know most women who have a baby are keen to minimise weight gain during pregnancy in the hope of returning to some semblance of their shape before. I too will probably fall in to this camp when I get a bit further on but right now I feel a bit of a fraud saying I am pregnant while just looking like I have maybe eaten too much at lunchtime and am a bit bloated. Does this make me a shallow idiot?

Anyone have any advice on when I should expect the big bump to appear? Am I worrying about nothing?

Forbidden fruit

This may make me an alcoholic but at this point I no longer care. I miss wine, specifically red wine. In fact a large glass of rioja or cabernet sauvignon would be perfect right now.

I used to enjoy more wine than was probably advisable in a week but I work in PR in London. Well that’s my excuse anyway. I was either drinking with clients, colleagues or having a glass on the sofa to get over the stupid stresses of the day. Now nothing makes me more depressed than the Sunday Times wine club order arriving and having to unpack it knowing that I’m not going to drink any of it.

The thing is I am now in the second trimester. Medical opinion seems pretty divided on whether one small glass a week will really have any effect or not after the first three months.  Every few months over the last few years contradictory advice has been in the papers while the Department of Health strongly advises against anything. Try doing a google search on this, it is so confusing! In such situations it seems to me to be better safe than sorry. This sadly means declining all alcohol for now.

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy/nutrition/foodsafety/alcohol/#6

http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/oct/06/pregnancy-light-drinking-no-harm-study

http://www.dh.gov.uk/prod_consum_dh/groups/dh_digitalassets/documents/digitalasset/dh_085426.pdf

My husband thinks I should just go for it if it will make me feel better. “What damage can one glass really do?” Well this is one small baby, so I don’t want to take any risks! If I am honest though, I wonder if this is just a classic case of ‘forbidden fruit’. As I am not allowed wine I want wine. If I wasn’t allowed fruit would I be dying for banana?

I’m sure many of you are horrified that I am even considering having a drink but I am sure they is an equal number out there who are also really missing a relaxing glass of wine or gin and tonic.

I’d love to hear what you have decided to do. Is one glass too much?

Caesarean section for every pregnant woman?

So today across the media it was revealed that NICE are planning to make caesarean section available for every pregnant woman that wants it,, free on the NHS. Apparently the risks of a caesarean are now similar to a more conventional birth. Yes a c-section costs an extra £800 compared to a ‘grit your teeth and push’ but apparently this is a great step forward in choice for women.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2055227/NHS-women-right-caesarean-section-birth-dont-need-it.html

NICE doesn’t move quickly so if it does decide to make c-sections widely available I’ll probably be pregnant with my fifth child by then. None the less, it has got me thinking. If I had the choice what would I choose?

I haven’t yet decided on how to give birth, or been exposed to the NCT,’ natural is best’ argument, but right now, drugs sound sensible and generally trying to reduce the pain as much as possible sounds like a good plan. I also want to be able to look after my baby as much as I can when it arrives, so avoiding a c-section if I can. That said, the aftermath for my body after pushing out a baby which just shouldn’t be able to fit through there seems frightening at best.

Would I choose a caesarean? I think probably not, but do I blame other women if they choose to? No I’m not sure I do. 

Underwear upgrade

There is no denying it, I may only be 20 weeks pregnant but my underwear collection already needs a rewrite. My baby bump may not be here yet but the increase to my chest size certainly is. Looking through the NHS advice and midwife advice, at this point I should be looking for new bras to last me the next few months which accommodate my ever increasing frame. However all the advice says I need to ditch the underwiring and go back to non-wired alternatives.

I haven’t worn a non-wired bra since I was about 15! Looking online and during a dire trip to M&S all the non-wired options I can find can only be described as hideous and each cup is the size of my head! Without the wiring an F cup seems to be made of twice as much material to provide the same support. Surely they can’t be suggesting that I wear something that my Gran wouldn’t even be seen dead in?

As soon as I search for non-wired bras of my size, google seems to think I want a maternity bra. While they will certainly be needed at the end of this nine month process I don’t think I really need a breast feeding mechanism right now.

Any advice on shops, websites or designs would be gratefully appreciated. I cannot believe I am the only woman who has a decent sized rack and can’t find a bra that doesn’t make me feel like a 50’s washer woman! Thanks everyone.

First scan: D Day

Written 29th August 2011 (Before I got my self in gear to start this blog)

It is nearly here. Tomorrow we finally see the first images of the newest member of our little family. I’m very excited but more than a little anxious. It has felt like we have been waiting for this day forever.

It wasn’t that long ago that ultrasound wasn’t that widely available. However, the 12 week or 3 month mark has been then magic deadline for a long time, when we can all breathe a sigh of relief and feel just that bit more confident that everything is going to be ok.  We reached the great date on Saturday but have held off telling anyone until we have seen he/she with our own eyes. I wonder if I was a religious person I would feel differently about this, being accustomed to having faith in things I cannot see or even understand. The development of two cells in to a child is surely one of the most amazing things that can happen in today’s society but I just cannot quite believe it is real until I’ve seen it. This lack of faith is even more ludicrous when you take in to account all the signs of pregnancy I have been putting up with over the last couple of months:

·        Nausea – so much nausea! If I managed a day without wanting to be sick I had a little celebration. This happened twice in a two month period!

·        Fatigue – I have never been so tired! I used to get home from work and lay on the sofa until I went to bed which was stupidly early. I became one of the most boring people I knew.

·        Tea and coffee. I cannot even think about them, let along drink them without feeling ill

So taking all of that in to account I feel confident then when I lay on that ultrasound table tomorrow and she covers my tummy with goo, that a picture of a baby will appear on that screen and we can celebrate and tell everyone we have ever met. However a little niggling doubt remains so until tomorrow I will continue to tell my mum “Yeah I’m fine, nothing major going on here”.

Welcome

Welcome to my first blog post. :)

This blog will be an honest account of our preparations, as husband and I get ready for the arrival of our first bundle of joy. If you are trying to get pregnant or currently carrying your own little person I hope you find this useful or at least entertaining.

For me I hope this blog will offer an opportunity to share excitement, vent/moan and just generally get down on (virtual) paper how I feel as we prepare for March when EVERYTHING is going to change.

Wish us luck

Mrs A